Borg Jokes

[Fleshcut]

Goodones JaM
Goodones...

[JaM]

Two borg ships are waiting before a traffic light.
Says one: It is green
Says the other: a bulk fighter

(for those who don't get the joke, a bulk fighter is green)

Q Why they don't cover the madhouses at a borg planet?
A Because if they did, they should cover the whole planet of all borgs

[JaM]

Q Borgs have invented new ships. These ships are very wide, you know why?
A Because everyone wants to sit in the front

[Metody I The Evil]

A Borg went to have his hair cut.
He sat on the chair.
The woman that was about to cut his hair noticed that he hadn't taken off his headphones.
She took them off.
The Borg immediately died.
She put them on her head and could hear:
"Breath in... Breath out... Breath in... Breath out..."


_________________
_____________________________________________
"Unity creates power"
Khan Kubrat to his 5 sons

[Metody I The Evil]

At the Borg school, the principal walked down the hallway and saw a little Borg staying outside a door - laughing and crying at the same time.

- What's wrong? Why are you crying?
- I farted in class and my Borg teacher asked me to leave the room
- Then why are you laughing?
- The teach and my Borg-mates are still inside

_________________
_____________________________________________
"Unity creates power"
Khan Kubrat to his 5 sons

[omarrus]

three people are standing on a hot building
1st person to the 2nd person
"i bet you i could lean on the thermal and get back on the building"
2nd person to the 1st person
"go on then"
1st person walks over to the edge of the building and leans over, till his vertical...comes back.
1st person to the borg
"i bet you $50 that you carnt do that"
borg
"ok, your on"
the borg walks over, atemps to lean on the thermal...thump
2nd person to the 1st person
"that was cheep supperman"

[compu_head]

I made this one up myself:
Q. What did one Borg say to the other Borg when they assimilated the Clown?
A. "I feel funny"

[Fleshcut]

[???]Borgjokes again[/???] Look sometimes at the date of the last post too. This was not a good idea. takes a flamethrower-->

[compu_head]

ok sry, *takes a flamethrower too and starts burning the place*

[ This Message was edited by: compu_head on 2004-05-26 20:22 ]

[steven1982]

I thought it might be funny to open this one again for old times sake

Two borg had their spaceship broken down and have to go to the nebula.
Then they see a busstation, so they decide to steal a bus and fly to the nebula with that.
So the first borg says i am going to steal the bus, then you go and stand and watch if nobody is coming.
The one who is watching hears a lot of noise and engines starting, busses moving, it takes a very long time.
Then finally the first borg flies out the hangar with a bus.
So the second borg asks, why did it take so long?
The first borg answers: Well the bus to the nebula was parked all at the back of the hangar.

_________________

[Trzbiatowski]

hey steevo checked out charliedidit yet is it scary?

[steven1982]

One borg is in court cause he is suspected from stealing diamonts.
It takes a long time, but finally the judge says, we don't have enough proof to find you guilty, you are free to go.
The borg says: ooow cool, and can i keep the diamonds to??


Q: Why was the borg swimming team honoured the last olympic games??

A: None of them drowned

_________________

[promethius2]

We are Borg. You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile. But we're not home right now, so leave a message after the tone and we'll assimilate you later... (beep)



_________________
Calvin: I'm a genius, but I'm a misunderstood genius.
Hobbes: What's misunderstood about you?
Calvin: Nobody thinks I'm a genius.

[promethius2]

LuxemBORG: The European Community is irrelevant.

_________________
Calvin: I'm a genius, but I'm a misunderstood genius.
Hobbes: What's misunderstood about you?
Calvin: Nobody thinks I'm a genius.

[promethius2]

Q. How can you tell the difference between a Borg and a Jehovah's Witness?
A. The Jehovah's Witness knocks and waits.
B. The Jehovah's Witness is not entirely certain in his beliefs.
C. You can get rid of the Jehovah's Witness.



_________________
Calvin: I'm a genius, but I'm a misunderstood genius.
Hobbes: What's misunderstood about you?
Calvin: Nobody thinks I'm a genius.

[steven1982]

Q: Why is a borg moving van 30 mtrs long?

A: Then the garden hose can come along.


Q: Why is a borg face damaged at monday?
A: He tried to eat with knife and vork on sunday

Q: How can you see that a borg has new shoes?
A: The box is still around it

Q: Why does a borg throws his watch out of the window?
A: To let time fly

Q: Why are borg schools below ground?
A: To think deeper

Q: How can you seperate borg milk from normal?
A: on the normal milk it says: open here, on the borg milk it says: open at home

One borg to another: if you guess how many sigarettes i have left, you can have all seven of them.
The other borg: eehm twelve?

_________________

[Trzbiatowski]

ummm nah

[promethius2]

Q: Why did the borg have tire tread marks on his back?
A: From crawling across the street when the sign said "DON'T WALK".

_________________
Calvin: I'm a genius, but I'm a misunderstood genius.
Hobbes: What's misunderstood about you?
Calvin: Nobody thinks I'm a genius.

[promethius2]

Q: Why did the borg tip-toe past the medicine cabinet?
A: So he wouldn't wake up the sleeping pills.

_________________
Calvin: I'm a genius, but I'm a misunderstood genius.
Hobbes: What's misunderstood about you?
Calvin: Nobody thinks I'm a genius.

[promethius2]

Q: Why did the borg get so excited after it finished its jigsaw puzzle in only 6 months?
A: Because on the box it said From 2-4 years.



_________________
Calvin: I'm a genius, but I'm a misunderstood genius.
Hobbes: What's misunderstood about you?
Calvin: Nobody thinks I'm a genius.