a lil fun in M-War

[Lou of East from West]

Take heart, anyone among you who believes you are technologically

challenged, you "ain't seen nuthin" yet. This is an excerpt from a

Wall Street Journal article:



1. Compaq is considering changing the command "Press Any Key"

to "Press Return Key" because of the flood of calls asking where the

"Any" key is.



2. AST technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was

hard to control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be the

plastic bag the mouse was packaged in.



3. Another Dell customer called to say he couldn't get his computer to

fax anything. After 40 minutes of troubleshooting, the technician

discovered the man was trying to fax a piece of paper by holding it

in front of the monitor screen and hitting the "Send" key.



4. Yet another, Dell customer called to complain that his keyboard no

longer worked. He had cleaned it by filling up his tub wi th soap

and water and soaking the keyboard for a day, then removing all the

keys and washing them individually.



5. A Dell technician received a call from a customer who was enraged

because his computer had told him he was "bad and invalid." The tech

explained that the computer's "bad command" and "invalid"

responses ..... shouldn't be taken personally.



6. A confused caller to IBM was having trouble printing documents He

told the technician that the computer had said it "couldn't find

printer." The user had also tried turning the computer screen to

face the printer -- but that his computer still couldn't "see" the

printer.



7. An exasperated caller to Dell Computer Tech Support couldn't get

her new Dell Computer to turn on. After ensuring the computer was

plugged in, the technician asked her what happened when she pushed

the power button. Her response, "I pushed and pushed on this foot

pedal and nothing happens."

The "foot pedal" turned out to be the computer's mouse.



8. Another customer called Compaq tech support to say her brand new

computer wouldn't work. She said she unpacked the unit, plugged it

in and sat there for 20 minutes waiting for something to happen. When

asked what happened when she pressed the power switch, she

asked,"What power switch?"



9. Another IBM customer had trouble installing software and rang for

support. "I put in the first disk, and that was OK. It said to put

in the second disk, and had some problems with the disk. When it

said to put in the third disk, I couldn't even fit it in." The user

hadn't realized that "Insert Disk 2" implied to- remove Disk 1 first.



10. A story from a Novell NetWire SysOp:

CALLER: "Hello, is this Tech Support?"

TECH: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?"

CALLER: "The cup holder on my PC is broken, and I am within my

warranty period. How do I go about getting that fixed?"

TECH: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?"

CALLER: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer."

TECH: "Please excuse me. If I seem a bit stumped, it's because I am

Did you receive this as part of a promotional at a trade show? How

did you get this cup holder? Does it have any trademark on it?"

CALLER: "It came with my computer. I don't know anything about a

promotional. It just has '4X' on it."

At this point, the Tech Rep had to mute the caller because he

couldn't stand it. He was laughing too hard. The caller had been

using the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder and snapped

it off the drive.



11. A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her

printer. The tech asked her if she was "running it under windows."

The woman responded, "No, my desk is next t o the door. But that is a

good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a

window and his printer is working fine."



12. And last but not least:

TECH SUPPORT: "O.K. Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at

the same time.That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen.

Now type the letter P to bring up the Program Manager."

CUSTOMER: "I don't have a P."

TECH SUPPORT: "On your keyboard, Bob."

CUSTOMER: "What do you mean?"

TECH SUPPORT: "P on your keyboard, Bob."

CUSTOMER: "I ain't gonna do that!"

[Nemesis]

Loooooooooool Those are hilarious

[JaM]

This site contains also a lot of those helpdesk stories, some of them are very old but they are still very funny

http://www.rinkworks.com/stupid/

[BladeTech]

loooooool. these are great

[Fleshcut]

Cupholder... damn!!!

[[_NaN_]]

Yeah, that just goes to show you how stupid some people can be. LOL...

_________________
Knowledge Is Power!

[steven1982]

Kind of reminds me of when i did that job, some are real stupid as that, those things really happen, and more often then you think. i once had a guy who said the mouse wasn't working, took me quite a while to figure out that he was actually holding the mouse to his monitor (at the icon he wanted to click) actually...
LoL

_________________

[BladeTech]

lol. so these things really happen then don't they?

[Skyfreak]

they do happen lol, and here is one of my real stories. Was working at IT and a customer said that he can't get onto our network, to which I said, "send ur network card" a package arrived and his harddrive was in there

geee a floppy in a cdrom? and so on. lmao